rose petals: nanowrimo 2012

So, NaNoWriMo has been over for a week now. I kind of left you all in the dust.

Oops. Hehe, sorry about that.

So basically, I meant to do a final vlog but everything has gotten away from me, especially when it comes to my health. When I'm not feeling well all the time, it was really hard to find some time to sit down and talk to a camera. Also, I was lacking confidence in my abilities as a video blogger, judging by how rambly and awful one of my vlogs turned out.

Anyway, yes. NaNo's over. Speaking of which, another reason I dropped off the face of the planet was because I was doing a lot of this:

That's right. Catchup.

Somewhere around Day 18, I stopped writing because my health flared so bad. I didn't write anything substantial for about a week. And then, on day 25, I decided I wanted to try to win this thing.

(a screencap from day 27. the way my stats spiked cracks me up.)

So I did. I had about 19,000 words to catch up on. And somehow, by writing exorbitant amounts, I caught up.

And I made it.

I won NaNoWriMo.

This makes my fourth year participating and my third year winning. And it just feels good, you know? To accomplish something. 

This novel saved my sanity this month. It gave me something to focus on when a lot of areas of my life were falling apart, physically and emotionally. It reminded me to write for myself, to just write for the sake of my own sanity. It made me remember how much writing has helped me emotionally in the past. It became my escape again, and for that I am truly grateful.

Rane and Lynx are one of the most adorable couples I've ever written, just fyi. I find that I learn things with each NaNo that I do, and this year one thing that stands out to me is that I learned that I can write romance. This is kind of something weird to admit, but I never thought I could before. I was worried I'd write something too sappy, so all my romances were like very deep friendships. I love these kinds of relationships, but for this year's NaNo, I accidentally ended up writing something different. Last month, without me forcing it, Rane and Lynx's relationship became extremely deep, beyond any other couple I've written. They had extreme amounts of emotions and sadness and hope and they're so bittersweet. It was so lovely, actually. I wrote about rose petals and burn medicines and war wolves and all of these things will always be what defines Rane and Lynx. ♥

(Rane also has more fangirls than he did at the beginning of the month, which is something I didn't think was possible, but his fanbase has definitely grown. Good on ya, mate. You deserve it.)

I love my other characters too, like Charlie, Enda, Clay, Anchor, Fritz, and Spice. Two of them, Charlie and Anchor, were actually in Silver Tears, but their characters deepened so much in this novel, as did Lynx's. I really feel like exploring the storyline of the outcasts was a good choice, because now I can revise it and make its cameo in Silver Tears even better. I have building blocks to work from now, and that makes me so happy.

Overall, I'm happy with the way my novel turned out, especially because I didn't have anything planned at the beginning of this year. I thought this novel would be an absolute disaster. I'm thrilled that Broken Wings proved me wrong.

On the writing front, I haven't written much at all since the clock stroke twelve on November 31st. Once I hit 50k, my motivation to write significantly dropped. I do want to finish this novel, and I promised myself I'd push myself to do so once November ended, but so far that hasn't happening. I actually think though that I need to take some time to recover. Writing the insane amount of words that I did really pushed me, especially because my body is in such a frail state already. So with that in mind, I don't feel so bad about taking a break.

I want to give some credit my NaNoWriMo support group for keeping me afloat this month. There have been several times where I'd wanted to give up, but these girls kept me going. We call ourselves the Tea-Spitters, and we've become a very close-knit group. I feel like I've found a cozy writing place to call my own. And it's truly lovely. Shout out to you, my fellow Tea-Spitters. Stay brave, stay strong, stay true. And remember: your choices will change the world.

That's a good note to close on, actually, as we end this chapter and transition into the next. Remember this, my world-changers, my friends with passion planted deep in their hearts. Remember this, fellow writers. Remember this, my starry-eyed dreamers.

Your choices will change the world.