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note to self: i’ll be there for you, always

written june 6, 2021. Photo by Kristine Cinate on Unsplash I have always looked for myself in other people. I think the idea was that they would somehow hold the pieces of me that I felt were missing. That maybe, if I wrapped my identity up in theirs enough, we would somehow make a whole person. It's not healthy to live like this, but I did it anyway — burning through relationships and searching for something I couldn't quite name. It was never enough, not to be myself, but it was never enough to latch my identity to other people, either. I got close, several times — I thought I had reached the pinnacle of self discovery. I thought I had completed myself. But in the end, relying on other people to help build yourself is never a viable way to do things. It's only recently that I've started to become comfortable with the idea of being enough, as I am, on my own. Several years ago, in this same position, I would have searched for another person to attach my identity onto,...
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In which Tuesday acts like Monday all over again...

This is the post where I apologize for not blogging.

I'm sorry for not blogging.

That said, I have been busy. Between getting new couches, driving all around town, watching Secret Millionaire, school, and babysitting, well, life has been crazy. Oh, and did I mention that I was asked to be a forum moderator on NarniaWeb.com? That was pretty much the highlight of my month. ;) I'm enjoying being a mod so much! The moderators are great, and a lot less scary now that I am one. ;) When I got a PM asking me to mod, I pretty much freaked. So here's a shout out to my NWeb peeps that read my blog. You are all amazing!

Another thing I've been doing is exploring the world of scriptwriting, with this crazy person, my Pip. We're participating in the month of craziness known as Script Frenzy. It's been pretty fun. We're at 19 pages right now, though I'm working to bring that to 20. I just got distracted and had to blog. Oops. :P Our script is going amazingly well though, and if you'd like to keep up on our progress, we have a joint account here, as well as my own on the adult SF site.

Anyway, I'll try to get back into blogging. At this point, this is going to be a short post, because for the past two days I've had an extremely bad headache. Tuesday was kind of like my Monday, except my Monday was pretty crazy-busy too, as I spent the afternoon helping little kids learn how to do public speaking. So the past couple days have been kind of hard for me. Hence the title. This weekend was fun but exhausting, because we bought a new couch and spent half the weekend running around town. Since I have chronic pain, and part of what I deal with includes chronic fatigue, it's been hard to recover from doing so much. *sigh*

Prayers would be appreciated. I've just been feeling kind of down lately, especially because of my incessant headache, so if you have any encouraging words, please leave them in a comment. :) I've missed you guys! *hugs*

So tell me, how've you been?
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  1. SusannahApril 5, 2011 at 10:27 PM

    You were missed! Hope you get out of your slump soon. :(

    By the way... you know that post you did awhile ago about Camp Rock 2? Yeah... so I watched the first and second one the other day. And now that one scene ("Introducing Me") is even cuter. I LOVED him in it. I have been showing that video to everyone and now I'm gonna link to it on my blog.

    Anyways, thank you for first posting about it, because it has provided me which lots of happiness. :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. iGirlApril 6, 2011 at 5:26 AM

    Wow, that seems like a lot!

    Me? Thank you for asking ;)
    I've been writing a lot and doing school and dance and all the normal stuff.

    I'm totally ready for warmer weather... I don't care if it's spring or summer, I just want it to be warm!

    *Hugs*

    ReplyDelete
  3. UnknownApril 6, 2011 at 11:40 AM

    Omgosh, you get to be a mod!!!!! :D :D :D That's so exciting! Conga rats, and now the mods feel a lot less scary to me, too, since I know one. :) :) Oh, they're real people, too, eh? :) And now you get to enter Uncle Andrew's Study! :)

    Hope your headache goes away soon! Those take a lot of the fun out of life. :/

    ReplyDelete
  4. LilyApril 6, 2011 at 2:47 PM

    Kylie, I have missed you sooooo much!!!! Everytime I got on Blogger, I always checked for your posts....glad to know you're okay. *wink wink*
    I'll pray for your headaches! I know how un-fun they can be. :(

    Love always,
    ~Lily

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hannah GraceApril 6, 2011 at 7:04 PM

    Dear, dear Skylee. *tight hugs* I hope things get better for you, and soon! Things have been rough on my side as well, but when I read this God reminded me that I'm not the only person who goes through troubles.
    "But the Voice of Truth tells me a different story,
    And the Voice of Truth says 'do not be afraid'..."

    He's always with you, Sweet Skylee. :-)
    Email me if you ever need to!
    Love you, so much,
    ~Half-Pint

    ReplyDelete
  6. JuliaApril 6, 2011 at 10:51 PM

    It's good to have you back! I tried to do scriptfrenzy last year, but I failed miserably. :P I'm sure you'll do great, though! :D

    ~Julia

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